Speak Your Truth Loudly Today So You Can Show Your Growth Tomorrow by Contradicting It

I am the Big Fat Liar

I am sorry that I continue to lie to you all. I do not really consider it lying but it for sure has not been truth telling. It is just the fact that I have been going by the seed of my pants since honestly I landed in Redmond OR god I don’t even know how long ago. A month? 6 weeks? I am way too lazy to check but it truly feels like a lifetime ago where this kind of all started.

If you have been along for most of if not the whole journey you probably have an idea of what I am talking about but it is not really something I want to get into again. What a journey it has been so far. The friends I have met, the old friends I have been able to catch up with, the sights, sounds and smells of cities far and wide. Some people would be exhausted after bouncing from hotel to hotel for over a month and you can consider me some people. I am currently pretty much broke and after a lot of time thinking and finally after laying under the stars on the North Shore of Oahu and being completely enthralled by all the stars that I saw I just could not seem to pull my attention away from the north star. A guide that has been used since probably man has been cognizant of itself and directions. I knew it was time to go home.

              Now I won’t be home for long, probably a duration of 6-10 weeks, I will be extremely busy during this time. I need to make cash to take care of first things at home such as rent and some debt to my mom lol. As well as create a base of funds to start my next travels with, so I will be working a lot, also I will be traveling throughout Ohio when I have time to catch up with friends and give my hugs and love before taking off for an unrealized amount of time. Hopefully to find a place in Southern Italy and explore as much of Europe as I can before the wind drags me westward and Asia specifically the Southeast begins to open up again.

              My goal over this next couple months will be to make money, establish my LLC and create more focused gameplans for the future of Shed Your Light. My gameplan past that will be to continue my journey of learning about myself, other cultures and people as well as focus on finding ways outside of just strictly one on one therapy and medication to help stabilize and better understand my triumphs ( I am so fucking sick and tired of saying “struggles” I am so proud of what my triumphs with mental health have brought me. My ability to empathize and a passion to help others) with mental health.

              I hope to along the way make people question there strongly held believes, not change them, but just show different perspectives on things. I love talking to everyone and hearing about whats going on in their lives because I am already trying to make myself an open book and I am tired of talking about myself.

              The reason I say I am a liar is because I want to put peoples mind at ease. Make them think I have a plan so they do not have to worry about me. Well I try to have a plan but unlike my hamstrings I tend to be extremely flexible. When I say I am going to do something to everyone do not take me by my word. To many things are going on for issues to not come up. But just know if I ever tell you one on one  I will do something you can bet your sweet bippy it will be done.

              If there is anyone one person whose journey for the truth at a similar age to mine it would probably be Rene Descartes, the more I realize I do not know the more I realize I have to continue to learn. I always considered myself a smart kid until I realized I knew about 1/10000000000000 of what is really going on in this world. I don’t know if Ill change the world, or write a book or be remembered after I am gone which was always such a big motivator for me. All I want to do is live this life to the fullest and make every day count.

Keep on keepin’ on,

N.m.B

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